I’m baaack…

I’ve missed this and I want to be better at posting here in 2014. I had a dear friend share her new blog link  with me earlier this week and it made me want to get back on here. (Her mentioning she missed reading it also might have played some part in today’s post as well.)

So, I didn’t know what to post since I have’t posted in almost a year and, wow, how much has changed since then. We now have a 5 year old (some days going on about 13 1/2 and other days the sweetest little girl you’d ever meet) and 3 1/2 year old (still spunky, feisty and giving us a run for the money, but so much fun). But we are another year into being their parents and while some days I think we have it figured out there are other days that I wonder what the HELL I am doing and that I was CRAZY for leaving my job to stay home with these two little crazy people.  For the most part I really do love it. Today, was a day I was totally and completely overwhelmed with love as I watched these two little ones run down our driveway and close our gate and run back together – all by themselves. Doesn’t sound like a big deal to most, but to me it was a pretty big deal. They.didn’t.need.me.  They were beyond excited to do it by themselves and more importantly, together. They held hands for some of the walk down the driveway and chased each other for the rest and I just sat on our front porch and watched them.  I couldn’t help but project farther ahead in life: isn’t this what we want them to be able to do? Take on the world. Be brave. Try new things. And leave the safety of home with Mom on the porch and come running back proud of their accomplishments. Today it was a gate; tomorrow it’ll be something else.  Whoa.

Think that’s deep enough for today.

Anyways, I emailed them a little note about watching them shut the gate and what a sweet moment it was to watch (see my previous post about emailing the girls here)and then sent a note to my hubby thanking him for letting me be here to watch that moment and  he wrote back two sentences that put tears in my eyes: “Warmed my heart.  I know there is a reason why I am working.” Now, you need to understand everything about this — I have sent maybe two total notes to my husband like this over the last three years of being home. I’m embarrassed to admit that most days he gets home from work and I am still in workout clothes, probably haven’t showered, am tired, frustrated, and my patience is shot. It doesn’t mean I’m not grateful and thankful that I get to be home with my babies but it’s definitely not always at the top of my priority list to thank him. Today, it just needed to be said and I am really glad I did.

Stick around —  I hope there will be more posts about our adventures with our orchard, our cows, and of course our kiddos.